The first approach to Buddhism involves adopting ways of thinking and attitudes to the world around us. These attitudes can help everyone, regardless of their view of religion or whether any other kind of spiritual belief has any meaning in their life.
Attitudes are states of mind. Helpful, useful ones are called virtuous, and negative, unhelpful ones are called delusions. They’re called delusions because we think they’re normal, but this is deluded because what’s ‘normal’ about filling your mind with stuff that stresses or displeases you? Remember too that these attitudes are all internal. They do not come from outside, we created them all by ourselves, although usually subconsciously and generally to fit in with family, friends, society, etc.
Many of these states of mind are discussed in modern psychology, self-help and therapy. Some give credit to Buddhism for them, other’s don’t. But it doesn’t really matter. What’s important is that we identify the delusions and try to remove them, whilst developing more virtuous attitudes instead. Delusions are things such as anger, hatred, bitterness, jealousy, pride, etc. Virtuous states of mind include love, compassion, patience, caring, tolerance and wisdom.
One classic example of a delusion is self-focus. We’ve all encountered the person who thinks only of themselves and not others, who thinks everything is about them. They assume their view of the world is right and that anyone who doesn’t agree with them is either out to get them or needs ‘sorting out’. It’s very hard to discuss things with someone like that because they get angry, frustrated and upset when you don’t conform to their way of thinking – the way you ‘should’ think.
The language they use may be filled with phrases such as ‘everyone is…’, because they can’t see that not everyone thinks the way they do and that they’re not the centre of the universe. Putting themselves in someone else’s shoes is a lost concept to them. They might talk about caring or generosity for a short while, but it will always come back to being about them or what they will get out of it.
A mind full of delusions is not a happy place to live. Self-focus is the ultimate delusion from which all others flow and we all have it to a greater or lesser degree. The fewer delusions we have and the weaker they are, the more likely we are to live a happier, more peaceful life.
Some of these attitudes are explained further in the Articles section of the site and in the ebook Finding Peace, available from www.finding-peace.co.uk.